(Repost from 11/2010)
I've spoken to many parents with kids in school who have various diagnoses. The question is always about whether or not it is a good idea that they, (school, teachers, friends and family etc.), know what the diagnosis is. That placing a "label" on them can be bad. Some have said their child will use it as a crutch, others have said that their child will be picked on, or it's just none of their business etc. etc. If I were to create a list of pros and cons I am sure to come up with a good list on both sides. I personally feel however that the pros far outweigh the cons.
A label, title or general description, helps people to understand what’s inside (you can't see Autism like a physical birth defect). If my son is having a sensory/regulation meltdown and a non ASD child is as well and they were side by side it would be hard to tell which is which. Unless of course you were a trained doctor or therapist. It’s hurtful to have bystanders give me the "you are a bad parent for not teaching your child how to behave in public" look when the meltdown just happened to occur in a public location. I am very sad to admit that I was once one of those onlookers passing judgment too.
I recall overhearing a parent say under their breath once that "a nice swat on the bottom would take care of that". Calming, redirecting and soothing an ASD child isn't that simple. It’s just not as black and white as that, heck the same is true for typical kiddos. I remember many times walking through the grocery store listening to a child screaming and thinking, take that child home or out of the store or do something about it so they stop. The screaming would just annoy me... now when I hear it I’m not bothered by it in the same way. I first think about what could really be going on and pray that what ever the underlying cause is the parent is able to find the means to make it better. Of course some kiddos ARE being naughty and just need some discipline but I don't assume that anymore, (we all know what it means to assume).
I got stuck at Wegman’s once by the milk coolers. The overhead train was driving by and my son was SO excited! Every time I tried to leave he screamed horribly! My husband called me while I was there and asked what I was doing, I informed him that I was stuck at Wegman’s by the trains, he chuckled. Not to laugh at me, but with me. Many times laughing in a difficult situation makes it easier to cope. He truly understood what I was up against and felt bad for me. After 30 minutes I had to leave. I prayed and prayed all the way to the front, as he screamed, that people weren't thinking the worst of me, but I knew some were. I hoped that on my way out of the parking lot that one of them would happen to be driving behind my car so they could see the Autism Awareness car magnet. That way they would know there was an explanation and much more to this screaming meltdown. I am not saying my sons’ behavior is excusable but some understanding would be nice. I’m sure that all those parents with criticizing eyes have been in my shoes at one time or another and have been mortified too by their childs’ public display.
I know of one parent who pondered the idea of whether or not to tell the school their child had high functioning Autism. They didn't want them to feel different or to be labeled and to use it as a crutch. I feared that the label their child would end up with would sadly be much worse. There are excellent resources for kids in school such as an IEP or 504. They are there to help them. They will not get that added help if the teachers don't know the diagnosis and that will only add to the frustration of the child trying to learn and the faculty trying to teach them. Not to mention the other children. I have been around children recently who are on the spectrum, or are bipolar or have ADHD and I know that what they are doing isn’t always in their control and a level of compassion and patience naturally comes over me as I think about what I am witnessing.
I guess my point is that when you define that medical concern it helps others to understand. A label is knowledge and while that label may have risks it's important that your child gets what they need and is in their best interest and sometimes the label is it. When my son acts out and I know in my heart it is ASD related and someone else is directly involved with us I will share that my son has autism. I am not sharing it to make an excuse; I am sharing it so they understand him and why he is doing what he is doing. I’ve been told that I shouldn't feel obligated to explain him or justify his actions and I totally understand that but I really don't mind sharing when it is appropriate. It helps to have people understand and that in turn helps him too :) This of course is just my personal opinion; I completely understand and respect those who may disagree.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Turning his system ON...
Reposting from 2010
When you want the lights to work, you flip a switch. When you want your car to run you turn the key. When I want to wake up and "function" I drink coffee, A LOT of it please!! Our latest discovery was around 13.5 months. Hunter seemed to function best if you turned his system ON. Hunters PT and my husband were trying repeatedly to get Hunter to take his first steps. He just didn't seem into it. He would more or less just stand there and not really attempt to walk or if he did it was maybe one step. He never really walked along furniture either. His PT decided to try something new; she tossed him in the air and had him land on his feet, not hard enough to hurt him of course but definitely enough to give his feet some input. A few tosses in the air and WOW!! He suddenly started walking to daddy! It was amazing!
Note to self; remove all hard obstacles that he could hit his head on when he falls.
Just to confirm this new phenomenon we tried it again without the jumping and low and behold he didn't walk. Just like many things, Hunter had an "on" switch and it was located on the bottom side of his feet. Who’d of thought!? So jumping on balls, bouncing on the trampoline, jumping on the floor etc. became a very important part of his therapy. And yes that would include the couch when he could sneak a jump in before we stopped him! This needed input remains today. It was really incredible to see how such a small action could make such a HUGE impact on his ability to accomplish a task. When he was jumping we began to notice that he would flap his hands like he was flying. Angels have wings to fly and he was surely an angel. This was when I first began to research and understand the term "stimming”. And the plot thickens…
When you want the lights to work, you flip a switch. When you want your car to run you turn the key. When I want to wake up and "function" I drink coffee, A LOT of it please!! Our latest discovery was around 13.5 months. Hunter seemed to function best if you turned his system ON. Hunters PT and my husband were trying repeatedly to get Hunter to take his first steps. He just didn't seem into it. He would more or less just stand there and not really attempt to walk or if he did it was maybe one step. He never really walked along furniture either. His PT decided to try something new; she tossed him in the air and had him land on his feet, not hard enough to hurt him of course but definitely enough to give his feet some input. A few tosses in the air and WOW!! He suddenly started walking to daddy! It was amazing!
Note to self; remove all hard obstacles that he could hit his head on when he falls.
Just to confirm this new phenomenon we tried it again without the jumping and low and behold he didn't walk. Just like many things, Hunter had an "on" switch and it was located on the bottom side of his feet. Who’d of thought!? So jumping on balls, bouncing on the trampoline, jumping on the floor etc. became a very important part of his therapy. And yes that would include the couch when he could sneak a jump in before we stopped him! This needed input remains today. It was really incredible to see how such a small action could make such a HUGE impact on his ability to accomplish a task. When he was jumping we began to notice that he would flap his hands like he was flying. Angels have wings to fly and he was surely an angel. This was when I first began to research and understand the term "stimming”. And the plot thickens…
What is Stimming?...
Reposting from 2010
Why is stimming associated with Autism or Sensory issues? I’ve searched many sites online for a good description and this seems to sum it up best.
Stimming is short for self-stimulating behavior, sometimes called "stereotypic" behavior. In a person with Autism, stimming often refers to repetitive behaviors like flapping, rocking, spinning, or repeating words and sentences. Although stimming is seen in almost all cases of Autism Spectrum Disorder it is also a behavior many people do. Biting your fingernails, pacing back and forth, twirling your hair, rocking your leg, and tapping your pencil are a few such examples. The list goes on… The difference between autistic people and the general population is that those with Autism will typically choose a stim that isn’t as socially acceptable or it lasts for an unusual amount of time. Twirling your hair or biting your fingers nails may not bother those around you but jumping and flapping over and over probably will, especially if you are older then 5 years of age. Many with Autism will also struggle with their ability to stop or control the stim and this can affect their ability to participate in many daily activities.
Stimming is done for various reasons. To cope with anxiety, fear, anger, and emotions, just to name a few. Like many we know, people on the spectrum may stim to cope with overwhelming sensory stimulation, (too much noise and light, to many people, etc.). Various treatments have been helpful reducing the stimming behavior, medications and therapy for example. I’ve spoken to other parents in the support groups about this and some have also shared that they or their loved one just grew out of it. This makes a lot of sense too since some things in general are harder to cope with when you are younger. As you get older maturity and experience can help you learn skills to cope and this is true for everyone, whether you have Autism or not.
In Hunters case most of his stimming is done to express happiness and excitement, although he will also do it when he is overwelmed or nervous to regulate his system and cope. I am grateful that it is not disruptive or distracting (yet). I say that because his jumping flapping is pretty tolerated right now seeing that he is under 5 years old but when he becomes a teen or adult, his jumping and flapping will be concerning so hopefully he too will outgrow it or have better control of it . When Hunter is scared or upset he stiffens his entire body. He has been known to occasionally hit or tap his own face but that is somewhat rare. When he was younger he rocked and swayed but it isn't seen as much now. If you turned the vacuum on he would spin in circles until you were done. This went on for about a year. Ironically when we purchased a new vacuum he never did it again, the sound it makes now is slightly different then the other vacuum and I can't help but wonder if the noise pitch isn't as stimulating to him now. He expresses now screams and covers his ears, getting very upset by it. He says it's "to loud!" so I know he doesn’t care for the new sound like he did with the other vacuum. I make every effort to vacuum when he isn’t nearby or home since it usually leads to a screaming fit until I have turned it off. No sense in stressing him out if I can avoid it, a few extra dog hairs from Yellow Dog, (aka Jasper-Jax our yellow Lab), on the bottom of my black socks wouldn’t do any harm. And yes, for those of you who are avid General Hospital fans, he IS named after Jax. I’ll save that story for another day…
Why is stimming associated with Autism or Sensory issues? I’ve searched many sites online for a good description and this seems to sum it up best.
Stimming is short for self-stimulating behavior, sometimes called "stereotypic" behavior. In a person with Autism, stimming often refers to repetitive behaviors like flapping, rocking, spinning, or repeating words and sentences. Although stimming is seen in almost all cases of Autism Spectrum Disorder it is also a behavior many people do. Biting your fingernails, pacing back and forth, twirling your hair, rocking your leg, and tapping your pencil are a few such examples. The list goes on… The difference between autistic people and the general population is that those with Autism will typically choose a stim that isn’t as socially acceptable or it lasts for an unusual amount of time. Twirling your hair or biting your fingers nails may not bother those around you but jumping and flapping over and over probably will, especially if you are older then 5 years of age. Many with Autism will also struggle with their ability to stop or control the stim and this can affect their ability to participate in many daily activities.
Stimming is done for various reasons. To cope with anxiety, fear, anger, and emotions, just to name a few. Like many we know, people on the spectrum may stim to cope with overwhelming sensory stimulation, (too much noise and light, to many people, etc.). Various treatments have been helpful reducing the stimming behavior, medications and therapy for example. I’ve spoken to other parents in the support groups about this and some have also shared that they or their loved one just grew out of it. This makes a lot of sense too since some things in general are harder to cope with when you are younger. As you get older maturity and experience can help you learn skills to cope and this is true for everyone, whether you have Autism or not.
In Hunters case most of his stimming is done to express happiness and excitement, although he will also do it when he is overwelmed or nervous to regulate his system and cope. I am grateful that it is not disruptive or distracting (yet). I say that because his jumping flapping is pretty tolerated right now seeing that he is under 5 years old but when he becomes a teen or adult, his jumping and flapping will be concerning so hopefully he too will outgrow it or have better control of it . When Hunter is scared or upset he stiffens his entire body. He has been known to occasionally hit or tap his own face but that is somewhat rare. When he was younger he rocked and swayed but it isn't seen as much now. If you turned the vacuum on he would spin in circles until you were done. This went on for about a year. Ironically when we purchased a new vacuum he never did it again, the sound it makes now is slightly different then the other vacuum and I can't help but wonder if the noise pitch isn't as stimulating to him now. He expresses now screams and covers his ears, getting very upset by it. He says it's "to loud!" so I know he doesn’t care for the new sound like he did with the other vacuum. I make every effort to vacuum when he isn’t nearby or home since it usually leads to a screaming fit until I have turned it off. No sense in stressing him out if I can avoid it, a few extra dog hairs from Yellow Dog, (aka Jasper-Jax our yellow Lab), on the bottom of my black socks wouldn’t do any harm. And yes, for those of you who are avid General Hospital fans, he IS named after Jax. I’ll save that story for another day…
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Realized something today...
Some feel that autistic children can't express love. Some can and some can't (well they can't in the obvious manner but there are other ways in which they can). My little man is so much better at expressing love then he used to be, that said I did realize today that he can give me kisses very easily however I need to ask for them. (Even then it isn't 100% of the time). He doesn't just come to me to express his love with a smooch. He def can show effection with a hug on his own but kisses need to be asked for. It's common for ASD people to struggle with innitiation so this makes sense. Am curious if this is just age appropraite with a typical child or if this is part of and all connected to the struggles of ASD. Think I will ask around to see what others get with their children of the same age. Will update later!
Thursday, August 11, 2011
If he had wings he could fly :)
Flapping is commonly seen with Autism. It's one of Hunters obvious stims :) He may not have the wings to fly but he can absolutely soar!
Monday, June 27, 2011
Always learning, always discovering and always changing...
This statement is true for both Hunter and our family. Autism isn't a "you get what you get" diagnosis. You can't just get the diagnosis, learn and understand the issues and treat the struggles expecting them to be better with therapy because every new day brings new discoveries and experiences and those lead to new challanges. You also can't assume the diagnosis of Autism means skills can't be learned. Not all challanges are bad, many are good and easily overcome and accomplished. Sadly though some are not so easy to treat, deal with or understand, some will test your every ability. There is no such thing as a Learning Curve with Autism, it's Learning Hills and Valleys.
When Hunter goes through a "growth spurt", (I'm not just referencing his physical growth, I am also referring to growth in his speech and language developement or sensory processing tollerance etc etc), we always notice one area tends to suffer as a result of it. For example: If he developes in his expressive language skills we often see him struggle more with motor planning or his stimming will increase or in some cases a new stim will emerge.
About a month or so ago we began to notice that Hunter would take his hands and rub his cheeks over and over and over. He did this to calm down or express excitement. Most often he used one hand but occassionally used both. He might even be seen tapping or gently slapping his own cheek too. Although carried out in slightly different ways each time, it was done for the same purpose. This went on for about 3 weeks or so. I spoke to his therapy teacher about it and we discussed what else may be happening in his developement to bring this on. After reviewing all his recent accomplishments we both concluded that he was showing some progress in both sensory processing and language. This new stim was a coping stim he had created to help himself get through this lastest advancement. I can't recall when exactly he stopped doing it but eventually he did.
You honestly get so used to seeing these stimming behaviors, you really don't notice them as much as an outsider looking in does, esp when they become a part of your daily life.
The lastest stim to emerge is an oral stim. I hope to get a video uploaded showing it since it's hard to describe. It is a cross between a throat clearling and a gasping for air kind of sound. He will repeat it over and over as if he had the hiccups. This one is more pronounced and many have noticed it. When it gets to a point where it becomes disruptive it's time to intervene and we are quickly approaching that point. Not sure what triggered this new stim so I'll have to put some thought to what areas he is progressing in or what may be the reason for it. We are going on about 2 weeks now with this one and I see it happening more and more, not less and less and thats not a good thing.
Many see him and express how wonderful he is doing and how they can't tell he is autistic. I would have to say that one of the biggest misconceptions with Autism and therapy is that people assume that if an issue is treated successfully and they've learned the skill to cope that it is no longer an issue and they kind of "out grow it" or "get over it". I completely agree that Hunter is doing amazingly well, I am SO very proud of how well he is doing!! But also stand firm in my belief that sometimes others inability to see it is because they don't recongize the tiny things he does that clearly reveal it. The problem is still there but not as obvious, it doesn't just go away, he has just learned to cope and over come it, most of the time. He has had several motor planning meltdowns lately and some onlookers have said "oh he is tired" or "he is just being naughty". Well maybe he is, maybe he isn't. Either way, he is trying to cope and this time it isn't working for him and it lead to a melt down. He can most definately be acting out as any toddler would be doing which is typical for his age however his Autism makes adapting, coping and redirecting much harder. When he's not successful, one shouldn't assume he is just misbehaving or in control of his actions and just needs to stop.
Has he been tired at times? Sure but meltdowns aren't just because he was tired or was misbehaving. Having Autism doesn't mean you only have behaviors a typical child doesn't have, it also means that some age appropriate behaviors will be taken to a new level and harder to deal with. It can often be as simple as instead of him taking 30 mintues to calm and be redirected, he may take an hour or more to calm or never be able to redirect and reamin "stuck" on his agenda. And being "stuck" isn't just is choice to be defiant. I used to try to explain it when it occured, now I don't bother. Sometimes my words help, other times they fall on deaf ears so I've found it isnt worth it sometimes. We had this happen a couple weeks ago, I said to my husband as we were crossing in the hall with a crying Hunter, "motor planning melt down", he said "yeah I know". Many around us saw it as one thing, but we knew what it really was. And as long as we knew I guess that's all that really mattered....
I've said a few times recently that had Hunter not gotten his diagnosis by now I would have begun to question some obvious red flags I was seeing.
With therapy a child on the spectrum can learn the skills they need to be successful but there will always be new challanges, good days and bad days. Autism doesn't go away, it is just managed. There will always be the chance in new stims emerging or days they regress and most of the time its ok. You just face them when they occur and do what you can to cope and work through it. It isnt easy but you do it because you HAVE to.
When you meet another parent who has a child on the spectrum you both may find great comfort in sharing experiences, it helps to not feel alone. The unspoken bond you get, that is more healing then any word shared, is the knowing that they GET IT, they UNDERSTAND your pain and frustration. They have walked in shoes like yours and climbed your hills and valleys...
When Hunter goes through a "growth spurt", (I'm not just referencing his physical growth, I am also referring to growth in his speech and language developement or sensory processing tollerance etc etc), we always notice one area tends to suffer as a result of it. For example: If he developes in his expressive language skills we often see him struggle more with motor planning or his stimming will increase or in some cases a new stim will emerge.
About a month or so ago we began to notice that Hunter would take his hands and rub his cheeks over and over and over. He did this to calm down or express excitement. Most often he used one hand but occassionally used both. He might even be seen tapping or gently slapping his own cheek too. Although carried out in slightly different ways each time, it was done for the same purpose. This went on for about 3 weeks or so. I spoke to his therapy teacher about it and we discussed what else may be happening in his developement to bring this on. After reviewing all his recent accomplishments we both concluded that he was showing some progress in both sensory processing and language. This new stim was a coping stim he had created to help himself get through this lastest advancement. I can't recall when exactly he stopped doing it but eventually he did.
You honestly get so used to seeing these stimming behaviors, you really don't notice them as much as an outsider looking in does, esp when they become a part of your daily life.
The lastest stim to emerge is an oral stim. I hope to get a video uploaded showing it since it's hard to describe. It is a cross between a throat clearling and a gasping for air kind of sound. He will repeat it over and over as if he had the hiccups. This one is more pronounced and many have noticed it. When it gets to a point where it becomes disruptive it's time to intervene and we are quickly approaching that point. Not sure what triggered this new stim so I'll have to put some thought to what areas he is progressing in or what may be the reason for it. We are going on about 2 weeks now with this one and I see it happening more and more, not less and less and thats not a good thing.
Many see him and express how wonderful he is doing and how they can't tell he is autistic. I would have to say that one of the biggest misconceptions with Autism and therapy is that people assume that if an issue is treated successfully and they've learned the skill to cope that it is no longer an issue and they kind of "out grow it" or "get over it". I completely agree that Hunter is doing amazingly well, I am SO very proud of how well he is doing!! But also stand firm in my belief that sometimes others inability to see it is because they don't recongize the tiny things he does that clearly reveal it. The problem is still there but not as obvious, it doesn't just go away, he has just learned to cope and over come it, most of the time. He has had several motor planning meltdowns lately and some onlookers have said "oh he is tired" or "he is just being naughty". Well maybe he is, maybe he isn't. Either way, he is trying to cope and this time it isn't working for him and it lead to a melt down. He can most definately be acting out as any toddler would be doing which is typical for his age however his Autism makes adapting, coping and redirecting much harder. When he's not successful, one shouldn't assume he is just misbehaving or in control of his actions and just needs to stop.
Has he been tired at times? Sure but meltdowns aren't just because he was tired or was misbehaving. Having Autism doesn't mean you only have behaviors a typical child doesn't have, it also means that some age appropriate behaviors will be taken to a new level and harder to deal with. It can often be as simple as instead of him taking 30 mintues to calm and be redirected, he may take an hour or more to calm or never be able to redirect and reamin "stuck" on his agenda. And being "stuck" isn't just is choice to be defiant. I used to try to explain it when it occured, now I don't bother. Sometimes my words help, other times they fall on deaf ears so I've found it isnt worth it sometimes. We had this happen a couple weeks ago, I said to my husband as we were crossing in the hall with a crying Hunter, "motor planning melt down", he said "yeah I know". Many around us saw it as one thing, but we knew what it really was. And as long as we knew I guess that's all that really mattered....
I've said a few times recently that had Hunter not gotten his diagnosis by now I would have begun to question some obvious red flags I was seeing.
With therapy a child on the spectrum can learn the skills they need to be successful but there will always be new challanges, good days and bad days. Autism doesn't go away, it is just managed. There will always be the chance in new stims emerging or days they regress and most of the time its ok. You just face them when they occur and do what you can to cope and work through it. It isnt easy but you do it because you HAVE to.
When you meet another parent who has a child on the spectrum you both may find great comfort in sharing experiences, it helps to not feel alone. The unspoken bond you get, that is more healing then any word shared, is the knowing that they GET IT, they UNDERSTAND your pain and frustration. They have walked in shoes like yours and climbed your hills and valleys...
Sunday, April 3, 2011
The Book :)
So excited to share that I finally took the jump to begin writing a book. :) Many thanks to everyone! Your support is what has lead to this dream coming true :) I will post when it is ready :)
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Parenting with a Palette...
Our children are our most precious creation, from the moment they are conceived and, for many, long before conception. To raise our children and create the adults we dream they will be we do our best to instill and apply many different things everyday. Its the "layers" our parents created that made us who we are today. Every technique we "apply" molds our children, if you mix two techniques you may have an entirely new concept or result. No two creations are the same. There is a saying in the Autism Community, "When you've met one person with Autism, you've met just one". And how true that is! The same can be said for any living being in my opinion, even identical twins have their own uniqueness. You can choose to use the same palette or parenting style with each child but keep in mind that there is no guarantee they will turn out or respond to it the same...
As an illustrator I believe in illustrating from the inside out. I pride myself in bringing life and inner spirit to all my pieces. Same goes for my children. Best advice I was ever given from an art professor was never to give a child a coloring book (not sure I agree 100% with that theory, occasionally is definately fine IMO, lol) When you do you create limitations in exploration and expression he'd say.... Give a child a blank page and the imagination is endless. We should always approach parenting our children with an open mind (a blank canvas), being open to many ideas, thoughts or techniques and not with the boundaries of one technique, therapy or belief system (or what worked or didn't work with another child). One thing I've learned as a mother of 3 is that as soon as you think you have them figured out a new twist emerges and you are back to square one (or close to it, lol) Sorry to ramble, hopefully that makes sense. My hope in sharing my story is that what I share is added to your palette of resources. To use and to apply, with other colorful concepts and techniques, to bring to life a beautiful child :)
As an illustrator I believe in illustrating from the inside out. I pride myself in bringing life and inner spirit to all my pieces. Same goes for my children. Best advice I was ever given from an art professor was never to give a child a coloring book (not sure I agree 100% with that theory, occasionally is definately fine IMO, lol) When you do you create limitations in exploration and expression he'd say.... Give a child a blank page and the imagination is endless. We should always approach parenting our children with an open mind (a blank canvas), being open to many ideas, thoughts or techniques and not with the boundaries of one technique, therapy or belief system (or what worked or didn't work with another child). One thing I've learned as a mother of 3 is that as soon as you think you have them figured out a new twist emerges and you are back to square one (or close to it, lol) Sorry to ramble, hopefully that makes sense. My hope in sharing my story is that what I share is added to your palette of resources. To use and to apply, with other colorful concepts and techniques, to bring to life a beautiful child :)
Friday, March 25, 2011
I can see clearly now the rain is gone...
Johnny Nash's words ring deep with me. I can clearly see that when the raincloud known as Autism is not compromising Hunters sensory system he can see and function clearly :)
I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
I think I can make it now, the pain is gone
All of the bad feelings have disappeared
Here is the rainbow I've been prayin for
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
Look all around, there's nothin?but blue skies
Look straight ahead, nothin but blue skies
I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
Castle in the Clouds...
I wanted to share an amazing moment with Hunter :) A month or so ago I was getting Hunter dressed and in that moment was curious as to whether or not he dreams and remembers. So I asked him...
Me: Hunter, when you are sleeping do you see pictures in your eyes?
Hunter: Yes... I fly up in da sky and in da clouds and fly to the castle in da sky. I go up up up and fly and with wings to da sky... He continued to talk about this for over an hour!
I shared this dream with a few people and it really touched us :) Several weeks later I was getting Hunter ready for bed so I said to him...
Me: Hunter, are you ready to go night night?
Hunter: Yes I go way up in the clouds and I fly without my wings.
Several days later his daddy asked him if he flies in his room, his reply was...
Hunter: Yes, I fly with da ghosts. He also added that they do not have wings but have hair.
One thing we have learned about Hunter is he shares experiences, he doesn't create stories yet so that means these dreams are very real to him and clearly vivid enough for him to remember them :)
One would say he is experiencing beautiful dreams and proud to share them or (depending on your spiritual beliefs) one would say that while he sleeps he is visiting Heaven, the beautiful place and the castle in the clouds from which we all came :)
Me: Hunter, when you are sleeping do you see pictures in your eyes?
Hunter: Yes... I fly up in da sky and in da clouds and fly to the castle in da sky. I go up up up and fly and with wings to da sky... He continued to talk about this for over an hour!
I shared this dream with a few people and it really touched us :) Several weeks later I was getting Hunter ready for bed so I said to him...
Me: Hunter, are you ready to go night night?
Hunter: Yes I go way up in the clouds and I fly without my wings.
Several days later his daddy asked him if he flies in his room, his reply was...
Hunter: Yes, I fly with da ghosts. He also added that they do not have wings but have hair.
One thing we have learned about Hunter is he shares experiences, he doesn't create stories yet so that means these dreams are very real to him and clearly vivid enough for him to remember them :)
One would say he is experiencing beautiful dreams and proud to share them or (depending on your spiritual beliefs) one would say that while he sleeps he is visiting Heaven, the beautiful place and the castle in the clouds from which we all came :)
Monday, March 21, 2011
He wouldn't play with me...
This sadly is a common complaint from my other two boys. Or Hunter will play but it is on his terms or it wasn't exactly how Hunter envisioned it and it leads to alot of screaming. My boys have learned an incredible way to draw Hunter into their play, many thanks to his therapy team!!
If an autistic child (or any child for that matter) wouldn't join your play, join theirs first! Use what they are doing as a magnet to draw them to your plan of action. This photo is the funniest thing ever :) My oldest son Daniel had NO idea I caught him in action with Hunter, lol. Hunter LOVES is Thomas tent, IMAGINE THAT! :) So Daniel joined him. His 6'4" body didn't quite fit as you can see. TOO FUNNY! And they had a BALL :)
If an autistic child (or any child for that matter) wouldn't join your play, join theirs first! Use what they are doing as a magnet to draw them to your plan of action. This photo is the funniest thing ever :) My oldest son Daniel had NO idea I caught him in action with Hunter, lol. Hunter LOVES is Thomas tent, IMAGINE THAT! :) So Daniel joined him. His 6'4" body didn't quite fit as you can see. TOO FUNNY! And they had a BALL :)
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Seriously?? Soap?!?
Hunter has a few things he obsesses over, one is soap. Yes SOAP! If he knows there is a box in the house that is not opened he is sure to find it! The first few times he insisted on having the soap were a challange, why on Gods earth would he want to play with soap bars?? Well knowing the answer to that just isn't going to happen. For Christmas I received this beautiful expensive organic bar and did all I could to keep it from him. He found it... *shakes head*. I can either fight the battle and listen to him scream (see post below, dealing with his screaming is not an option!) or I can give in and watch him in his glory play with bars of soap :) Yesterday he was quite engaged in lining them all up on his Thomas the Train table and pushing them along. It was quite comical actually. (Even funnier when you happen to catch him bolting out of the bathroom where he was on the hunt for some...) Hummmm I guess his name is appropriate, lol. I promise you, if your child is diagnosed with autism you will see many things that will you would never expect in a million years. Some of those things will make you cry and some of those things will melt your heart :) I am always on high elert when he plays with the soap, unforunately they are not tear free and thats a whole nother issue! :(
Sunday, February 20, 2011
A messy creative moment!
This is probably the most imaginative thing I've EVER seen!! We have a stuffed dog with a hole in it (yeah, was supposed to sew it MONTHS ago, lol). Hunter has this thing about taking the stuffing out, not a good thing when I am the one who has to clean it up! You'd think after a few clean ups I'd of sewn it by now... nope...
So today he pulls the stuffing out and proceeds to throw it around saying it was snow balls. He learned that it was like pretend snow because he saw the fake stuff in many retail stores during the Christmas season. So once he's covered our floor with fluffly white stuff he drops and begins to make snow angels!! WOW! Just like he does at school with his friends outside :) One should NEVER assume being autistic means you will not be smart and creative! So proud of my little snow angel :)
So today he pulls the stuffing out and proceeds to throw it around saying it was snow balls. He learned that it was like pretend snow because he saw the fake stuff in many retail stores during the Christmas season. So once he's covered our floor with fluffly white stuff he drops and begins to make snow angels!! WOW! Just like he does at school with his friends outside :) One should NEVER assume being autistic means you will not be smart and creative! So proud of my little snow angel :)
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Friday, February 18, 2011
I need ear plugs...
The scream.. the HIGH PITCHED scream is SO ear piercing!! When Hunter gets upset he now SCREAMS so loudly and high pitched its amazing that he doesn't shatter glass (or make a bird explode like Princess Fiona). Really hoping it's a faze and passes soon!! I know it's age appropriate but he takes it to a new level. (Thats what autism does in many situations, it just intensifies typical behavior). That can be very good sometimes and sadly sometimes it's very hard... oh so hard!!
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Make a vow today that this year you will bond with an autistic child...
I promise that you will not only learn alot more about them than you expected to learn. You will also learn alot more about yourself :) Better yet... make a vow to bond with anyone who has a disability (or different ability as I say). You are sure to have the same experience :)
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
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